*I'm paranoid to no end, everywhere I go I believe people always think negatively about me. This could be because the people I love are the same people who have friends and talk about them behind their backs, and I never know if they're doing the same to me whenever I'm not around.

*But at the same time I trust people too easily because I don't care about myself enough to keep a guard up. Actually, I'm extremely apathetic when it comes to me. I don't worry about where I'll end up in the future and I'm more likely to cry about something that's happen to you than myself. I'm far to nonchalant when it comes to me.

*I attach and detach to people, way to easily. The kindest act toward me, I'll do almost anything you want. But if you want nothing to do with me, I'll gladly give you space and suffer in silence.

*I think my opinions are inferior. I still share them very occasionally but it doesn't make me feel any better or liberated. Some--no, most people don't take it seriously or just don't listen to me all. So I take the role as the quite, anti-social observant one at the dinner table.

*I don't value the opinion of what my mother thinks of me, but I do with everyone else.

*I can't stick to anything when it comes to things I want. In other words I'm indecisive and uncommitted. Its rare that I'll find something I want and the desire to have it will just stick. When I do start things, after a short while of doing, I feel like I should give up on it and most of the time I do.

*I daydream so much, I'm barely in touch with the real world.

*I tend to be a hypocrite sometimes. Just a few months I was just saying how I don't see why people would smoke cigarettes and I would but because I was having a terrible day on Friday, I bought myself a pack and lit up.

*I'd rather please other people, than my own family. Sometimes, I wish could trade them in.

*I'm positive I won't fall in love and stay in love. I'm pretty much in my own little box where I stay away from people when given the opportunity because I truly believe deep down that I don't know what love (man-woman kind) is, I won't find it and because of who I am, I don't deserve it because I can't commit to the things I want.

....Shit, I'm a terrible person LOL These are things I've noticed about myself and I felt like I jolt them down and share, mhm.

* i procrastinate to the point of no return, but get angry when my husband does the same.

* i tend to picture things in my mind a certain way and then get mad when they don't turn out the way i pictured or i boss other people around if they aren't doing it exactly the way i envisioned it.

* i get really attached to people (sometimes excessively) and it often gets taken the wrong way.

* i (way too) often speak before thinking and i either make an ass(hole) of myself or i hurt someone that took it wrong.

* i almost always over-analyze EVERYTHING.

* i insist on being as independent as possible in everything (from doing housework to paying bills) but then i get annoyed or angry when nobody is helping me out.

I have a hard time slowing down and being in a moment.
I can be insensitive at times.
I can expect alot from people that I care about.
I am too nice at times and can get taken advantage of if they are swift.
I am sometimes "too in my head". sometimes I am too logical for my wife too.

I stopped caring so long ago that Idk what to say here. And I don't want to be healed of it because it's where I am comfortable - though miserable as well. But it's my burden to bear.

Let's see I have a lot of flaws, my #1 prolly being: severely pessimistic [I tend to view the glass as half empty which sort of manifests itself into the everyday happenstance of my life, because I allow it].
2. very harsh in my critique and judgement of other people. 3. I contradict myself a lot. 4. I lose control of my emotions - becoming too emotional is a let down and a turn off for my hubby. 5. I can't let loose and just enjoy life - I feel I HAVE to worry because everyone else [as I see it] are too god damned carefree about everything. 6. My mood fluctuates so easily that even I get upset with me when it alters to a negative state. 7. I seem to make friends rather quickly and easily to other people - my hubby seems to think so - but I really don't. 8. As many bad things that I see in my life, I kind of enjoy them - which makes me a sick, twisted person... I suppose. & 9. I let my past as well as my fears get in the way of my future and my happiness. [poe&ats]

I am too old to be shy as I used to be - umm and still idolize the Count http://www.textfiles.com/exhibits/hackerpics/pics/countzero.jpg

The only autograph I have ever asked for...

Also, way more arrogant than I was 10 years ago.
Don't like people much
Out of practice with skills I care about
Possibly more vain than I was as a younger person
Possibly becoming arrogant
Better at network security than playing Xbox
Hooked on Xbox
Hopefully that's all.

i'm shy

i'm passive

i'm afraid to speak my mind and tell people how i really feel about them

I'm rude

I'm a workaholic

i hold people back based on my own fears

I don't help the people close to me as much as i should

too proud. i hate admitting when i need help, and hate asking for it more.

i'm too distainful of humanity, to the point where i don't care when major atrocities killing mass amounts of people do not bother me in the slightest.

i'm too relaxed, to the point where i screw myself over.

I bottle everything up inside, and don't lash out often enough. This leads to people getting seriously damaged if they push me too far.

Let's see, I have changed so much in my old age...I think I can remember how I started out.
I'm way too shy.
I'm way too gullible.
I'm way too naive.
I never stick up for myself.
I'm cruel.
I'm mean.
I'm hard on myself...lol.
Now a days I'm just a hard dick looking for assholes.

I completely disregard other peoples feelings all the time.

I can be a huge asshole. and get enjoyment out of it.

I pick on everyone. Even if they are friends i still make fun of them. IMO it isnt in a mean hurtful way. But i assume some people see it that way.

I act like i'm better then others yet i don't believe i am.

I dislike people in groups. I can get along with people one on one. But i can really hate the same people if they are in a group of friends.

I make rude, racist, sexiest, homophobic, disgusting jokes all day at work. (a gay guy at work got pissed at me last week for using the word fag so much. I called a co-worker a gayfag about 6 times in less then an hour)

Offending people amuses me. (reason for the one i listed above)

I dont make any effort to hang out with friends. (which is the reason i have not made any friends in Montreal in 2 years outside of work)

If friends don't make the effort to keep in touch i'll probably never talk to them till they do so first.

If i don't respect a women i treat them like horse shit.

I justify this by thinking they deserve it for being a whore/cunt/bad person in general.

I think thats enough for now.

Ok I'm going to start off with what other people have told me.

I'm too emotional (my mom tells me this all the time)

I'm too negative (if telling it like it is; is being negative then yea, I guess I am negative)

I take things too personal. (also another mom favorite)

I'm passive ( haha, yea until you hit a subject that I disagree with you on)

I have too much rage.

I'm lazy. (If the person that told me this wasnt my fiances little brother, I would have punched them in the face) There is a difference between being lazy
and choosing not to clean a house after 4 fucking grown ass men.

---------------------------------------------------
1. Sometimes I contradict myself.

2. I do have a lot of rage inside of me but its mainly from my shit head father. He makes my blood boil and I hate him. Anyway, I know this rage is bad because I tend to take it out on everyone but him. I use to judge guys based off of how he was and I never even gave them a chance. I would let my boyfriend know right in the begining that if he ever put his hands on me I would kill him in his sleep. This always made them scared or intimidated by me which I started to get tired of. It made me feel distant from the person so I stopped beind so judgemental.


3. I am really stubborn and if I have my mind set on something I wont stop until I have what my mind is set on. Like with jobs, if I dont want to work somewhere then I wont. When I went job hunting, the only place I put in an application at was target. I didnt even check out other jobs. I wanted to work at target and so I did. (not anymore though, Fuck target they suck!!!!!!)


4. I'm really shy and I get way too nervous around new people. Face to face anyways. If I ever met someone from TT I probably wouldnt talk much at first.

5. I have REALLY bad trust issues. I do not trust anyone, not even myself. I'm always scared someone is going to do something behind my back and I will never know about it. This is another reason I dont talk to people right at first.

6. I am really emotional, but I have a big heart and I cant help it.

7. I let little things bother me too much. If someone moves something on the dresser and doesnt put it back I get all bent out of shape.


8. Everyone is a hypocrite at times so I have that flaw as well.


9. I am a very passionate person and sometimes when I'm talking to someone they mistake the passion for anger becuse I get so into it I dont realize the tone of my voice. This is something I am trying to work on as of this moment. This is a recent flaw I am having conflict with. Well I'm working on this for my fiance.

I am too hard on others.

Too defensive about my own freedoms but willing to overlook others.

Easily embarrassed but unwilling to show it

I do not show others how I feel toward them enough.

I have severe social anxiety.

Too breezy with other peoples emotions.

I hide behind my limitations to give me better reasons not to do things.

I justify the things I do and do not act the same about others.

Thats all for now.

-I never want to admit I'm wrong

-I think I can help everyone

-I never follow my own advice

-I treat the people close to me like idiots

-I'm smartass to all my friends and alienate them

-At the same time, I manage to be too damn nice and giving to people.

-Not assertive enough

-Not decisive enough

-Give up on myself too easily

-Live in the past

-Daydream too much

-Never finish my projects, instead focusing on things like video games.

-Have a temper that comes out when least expected

-Can often be hypocritical

-So on, so forth....

- I'm way too stubborn for my own good.

- If I'm feeling really bad I can shut myself down to the point where no one will be able to reach me.

- I got discipline issues, I procrastinate a lot and can sometimes not finish a project due to being scared of failing.

- I am way too emotional, a comment said (not necessarily meant as a mean one or even directed towards me) can ruin my whole day and make me depressed for several days.

(this post might be updated later)

I'm too emotional, and ultrasensitive to comments and such. The smallest argument can send me into tears.

I'm pushy at work sometimes. I don't mean to be but the way i ask people to do things give them the impression that i am.

I get attached to people very easily, but when things go wrong I drop them quickly out of my social life for a very long time.

Yes, I judge people base on my first impression of them. But its a habit that i am trying to unlearn.

I half ass my projects or procrastinate a lot. If i could be consistent in my work and projects i know i could do a lot more with me life right now.

1. i'm a crybaby. if i don't get my way, i pitch a royal fit. i don't know why i do this, and sometimes it's ridiculous, but i can't help it.

2. i'm really bossy. things have to be done MY WAY. if someone tries to do something their way, it pisses me off til i make them do it my way or i end up doing it myself.

3. i'm way too aggressive. i don't even entertain the notion that someone will take advantage of me, because i make sure from the very beginning that they can't.

4. i stay on the defense a lot of time. sometimes simple little things people say to me end up seeming, to me, like they're attacking me, which makes me react bad and i end up attacking people back, usually for no reason.

5. i don't think before i speak. it gets me in a lot of trouble. my dad also tells me 'your give-a-damn is busted', which is from a country song, but it's true. i could give a damn about most things in life if it doesn't pertain to me.